So… someone’s finally making the comms badge. It was 16 years between Star Trek airing and the first commercially available cellular telephones. But it’s taken 27 years from TNG airing to get to this point. I thought the pace of technological advance was supposed to increase…
Spam. BECAUSE COOL PENNY IS BETTER THAN MILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
Cleaning out the junk mail and found this. It’s been a while since I’ve seen a 419 this bad. The all caps and terrible spelling are a nice touch, but the sheer length is…. impressive.
(There’s also stuff in the spam folder to help with that, as it goes.)
MY DEAR FRIEND .
I AM MRS.REEM JONES A SENIOR STAFF WITH THE ECO-BANK OF COTONOU-BENIN REPUBLIC (EBCBR) I AM WRITING YOU THIS LETTER BECAUSE COOL PENNY IS BETTER THAN MILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
IT IS BETTER FOR ONE TO LIVE AND DIE A POOR HONEST MAN THAN A RICH DISHONEST ONE,I AND THE CHIEF SECURITY OFFICER (CSO) OF OUR BANK HAVE ARRANGED WITH AN OFFICER IN THE COMPUTER SECTION, ENGINEER JUSTIN TO BRING OUT A PART OF YOUR TOTAL CONTRACT SUM AMOUNTING TO TEN MILLION US DOLLARS.
THE REASON WE ACTED THIS WAY, IS THAT, DUE TO THE INFORMATION GATHERED FROM THE BANKS COMPUTER NETWORK SYSTEM, YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR A LONG TIME TO RECEIVE YOUR FUND WITHOUT SUCCESS,I ALSO DISCOVERED THAT YOU HAVE MET ALL THE STATUTORY REQUIREMENTS OF THE ECO-BANK IN RESPECT OF YOUR CONTRACT PAYMENT, YOUR PROBLEM IS COMING FROM THE INTEREST GROUPS.
A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED IN YOUR PAYMENT AND THOSE PEOPLE ARE MERELY DOING PAPER WORKS WITH YOU AND THAT EXPLAINS WHY YOU RECEIVE EMAILS AND PHONE CALLS FROM DIFFERENT PEOPLE EVERYDAY.ALSO WE FOUND OUT THAT SOME OF THE OFFICIALS OF THE PARASTATALS THAT EXTORTED A LOT OF MONEY FROM YOU, WITH THE PRETEXT OF HELPING YOU.
I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT THIS MAY LAST FOR YEARS YET NOTHING HAPPENS IF, YOU DO NOT GO AWAY WITHTHOSE OFFICERS ,AND FOR SECURITY REASONS, DO NOT TELL ANYONE THAT YOU HAVE YOUR MONEY, UNTIL YOU RECEIVE CASH AT YOUR DOORSTEP.
THE MONEY IS IN ONE SECURITY-FUNDPORTFOLIO YESTERDAY WE WENT FOUR COURIER COMPANIES TO MAKE ARRANGEMENTS ON HOW TO SHIP THE FUNDPORTFOLIO BY COURIER TO YOU.
DHL, EMS, FEDEX, ISA ALL SAID THAT THEY MUST OPEN THE BOX FOR INSPECTION WITH THE COOPERATION OF THE CUSTOMS BEFORE SHIPMENT THIS IS SOMETHING WE WANT TO AVOID BECAUSE THE BOX WERE PADDED WITH MACHINE,WE TOLD THE COURIER COMPANY THAT THE BOX CONTAINS PHOTOGRAPHIC AND FILM MATERIALS AND WHEN OPEN WILL LOOSE ITS EFICACY.
WE DID NOT DECLARE MONEY BECAUSE COURIER DOES NOT CARRY MONEY.TODAY A FRIEND OF MINE WHO IS A DIPLOMAT DISCLOSED TO ME THAT THERE SOME DIPLOMATIC EXPERT THAT ALWAYS LIFT FUNDS FROM ONE COUNTRY TO ANOTHER,IT HAS DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY AND CANNOT BE INSPECTED BY ANY CUSTOMS ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, I WILL MEET WITH THEM AS SOON AS I GET YOUR PERMITION.
THE DIPLOMAT WILL HELP US SO WE DO NOT HAVE ANY PROBLEM, WE HAVE CONCLUDED THAT YOU MUST COMPENSATE US WITH FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS AS SOON AS YOU RECEIVE YOUR MONEY.
TO THIS EFFECT, YOU WILL SEND US A PROMISSORY NOTE FOR FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLAR ALONG WITH YOUR MAILING ADDRESS FOR SENDING THE BOX BY DIPLOMATIC,PLEASE I URGE YOU TO MAINTAIN TOPMOST SECRECY TO AVOID PROBLEMS,DO NOT DISCLOSE THIS TRANSACTION TO ANYONE UNTIL YOU HAVE YOUR FUNDPORTFOLIO.
I WANT TO HELP YOU BECAUSE SOMETHING IN ME IS TELLING ME THAT, YOU ARE AN HONEST PERSON,WE SINCERELY HOPE THAT YOU WILL FULFIL YOUR PROMISE AFTER THE CONCLUSION OF THIS TRANSACTION.
WE SHALL THEN HELP YOU TO SHIP THE FINAL PART OF YOUR FUND TO YOU,GOD IS WITH US AS WE WAIT FOR YOUR REPLY THROUGH THIS E-MAIL ADDRESS: [redacted]
Here is my dirty number: [redacted]
I wonder how the cultural perception of, say, a PC changes when there’s no longer anyone left alive who was involved in creating the first cut? When the knowledge is handed down, taught in schools rather than peer-reviewed, when all the artifacts are ubiquitous and mass produced rather than unique and hand-assembled in a garage somewhere. There’s no “personal” ownership the concepts, they just exist and the current stewards refine them.
(Of course, in some respects this has been going on much longer than you might think - even our nerd elders where nerding on the shoulders of giants. Just another iteration.)
Today I have mainly been led up the garden path. (Figuratively, obviously.) But that’s ok, because I’ve discovered Monument Valley (a hallucinogenic Escher nightmare isometric puzzle game on my iPhone) and everything is alright.
A hallucinogenic? Or *AN* hallucinogenic? The whole way we treat leading H’s in English seems to be shifting. I swear it’s either disappearing it becoming a vowel. I blame those people who call herbs “‘erbs”.
Somehow it completely escaped my notice that Pink Floyd are releasing a new record in October. Apparently it’s the instrumental stuff that they recorded alongside The Division Bell, but Dave’s gone back and recorded some singing.
Now I’m all for new Pink Floyd on general terms, but I’m not sure one last album of stuff that’s inferior* to The Division Bell is the way to go out. Although, technically, finishing on high would probably mean going back in time and stopping talking sense into Roger Waters before The Final Cut. So that’s not gonna happen.
* - inferred, cos if it was good they’d have released it instead, right?
Given I’ve had a bit of a view from the inside I’m of the opinion that the UK Parliament is (sometimes) quite forward thinking when it comes to technology. It’ll certainly be interesting to see what comes out of the commission.
Been playing guitar this evening, revisiting stuff I learned to play when I was a youngun’. It turns out that I can remember note-for-note how to play a two-hand tapping Satch piece I originally picked up in the early nineties but I without an immediate interweb feed I could not for the life of me remember what the tune was called.
Still, I’m increasingly worried about how much I’ve forgotten and how much I tend to forget, and yet for some reason it seems notes tend to linger. So at least when the dementia finally kicks in I’ll be able to earn a living busking.
Today is proving to be a struggle. Two nights on the piss with various ex and contemporary coworker types has left me weakened, and the gods have decided to punish me for my excess by waking the kid up at 3am and then sending day job problems that I don’t understand or care about but that have to be fixed RIGHT FUCKING NOW anyway. <dannyglover>I’M TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT</dannyglover> etc
Am soothing my nerve endings with Bowie. (“Outside”, if you were wondering.) (which you weren’t)
I really must start using this blog as an actual blog rather than a link dump. If nothing else, in my other life (the one that pays the bills) I’m developing a thing with RSS reading capabilities and need a ready supply of test data. Ideally though I should start capturing some if the ideas I have before they escape from my brain.
(As an apparatus for capturing ideas my brain is analoguous to a stable withan open door and horse-sized holes in the walls from which the horse has not only already bolted but subsequently expired and been made into glue.)
I have been thinking a lot about doing music. There is a playlist on my phone that might be a record, although my studio is presently in boxes
The closest possible musical reference point I can give you for Grant’s new record is imagine that Jeff Lynne’s War of the Worlds was a semi-autobiographical rant about lost friends, caffiene, music and paranoia (but with less instruments and no Richard Burton that I could discern.)